I’m catching up from the Arise conference that I’ll be sharing about soon! I have two other speaking engagements this week, so I’m honored to have Tracy Teppler of My Daily Walk in His Grace and Encourage 24/7 share today! I wonder if you can identify with the story! Also, congratulations to Katy for winning the giveaway of Michelle Howe’s book, “It Is Finished!”
From Tracy:
As I was hanging the washing up the other day, I was mulling of the closeness, or lack thereof, between myself and my daughters! I felt wounded because I want to be close to my daughters as I was never close to my own Mom. Now don’t get me wrong, I love my Mom. We’re just not close!
I have been a “stay-at-home Mom my children’s whole life. My mother was a working mom. We are a family of believers. I grew up in a non-Christian home. Sure, I make tons of mistakes but then, who doesn’t? I choose to go to my girls when I mess up and say sorry. I’m far from perfect. I’ve done way too much yelling. But still, I thought we were close….
But my girls are 20 and 18 and they are stretching out their wings and looking to their futures and, well, I feel forgotten and only remembered when they need something bought and paid for, or done for them.
So, back to the washing…. This is all going on in my mind and I’m telling the Lord that I suppose this means I need to let go of them as they grow and let go of my desire to be close to them and just be available when necessary. And the thought came to my mind, “Tracy, you are a safe harbour. The children are ships that are going to leave port and go out into the ocean, but they will return for supplies, for fuel, for safety! You are a safe harbour!”
I felt as if the Lord were saying, “yes, the relationship is going to change, but they will always return and they will always turn to us, their parents, for guidance, safety, heart and emotional refueling.” That gave me a some peace.
And as the mind continued on this path, I felt that I had peace in letting them go and peace in being available. And in the natural I felt more joy and that came across in my demeanour thus my communication with them was sweeter that day and they sensed a confidence in me, which in turn relaxed them around me, and harmony was being restored.
This is a new phase in my life and in theirs and the best place to go for guidance and peace in any situation that arises, is to the Lord!
So, inner peace restored and outer peace more evident!
Blessings!
Tracy
“We give them roots so they can have wings”. My “kids” are now 39 and 41. It has taken time and a lot of listening in worship for me to realize that I am that safe harbor for them–thank you for the lovely vision of ships and harbors. (But I do miss the gifts they bring me–humor, straight talk, and still thinking I make the best cinnamon rolls.) Blessings, Barb
Hi There, you are so right. I am also looking forward to this different relationship, where we enjoy each others differences and revel in our love for each other. Thank you
God bless
Tracy
Being an “empty nester” is hard, especially after all the years of activity and then so much quiet. But I love the thought that God gave you — a safe harbor! That is beautiful!
Blessings, Tracy. May you feel the love of God covering you today!
In His grip, Joan
Hi Joan, I too am thankful for that God-given thought. Kind of was feeling a little abandoned 🙂
God bless
Tracy
As someone who has been there, hang in there, Tracy! You are right! They will come back to you! God’s blessings and grace be with you as you open your hands and give them their freedom to go, ….and come back time and time again! My relationship with my daughters is extra special.
Hi Esther Joy, thank you for this encouragement. It is amazing how, when my attitude changed, the relationships seemed better already.
God bless
Tracy
Hi Tracy! I think your thoughts about your daughters is shared by Mom’s everywhere! I love the image of being a safe harbor (great photo too!). We raise them to be independent, and then are so surprised when they reach that goal.
I know they love you so much, and appreciate the wings you have given them. And thanks be to God who gave you the peace you needed.
Blessings!
Hi Ceil, so true, yes, I am grateful that God is gracious and merciful and doesn’t leave this mom or others wondering!
God bless
Tracy