Hey Friends! I’ve been off the radar for a few weeks finalizing the manuscript for my new book on parenting during the full house to empty nest years. I hope to be back on the blog with fresh topics soon! But I’m excited to share a giveaway with YOU!
Cindy Bultema is a ministry and speaking partner and has a powerful story. She is a woman who’s walked in not-so-perfect places with her kids, marriage, and womanhood. I’m excited to share a snippet from her new book Live Full Walk Free AND a giveaway!
Read all the way to the bottom for how YOU can enter the giveaway, and one of You will be send a brand new copy of her powerful book.
Here’s Cindy with a sneak peek at Chapter 2 of Live Full Walk Free:
Unite Don’t Fight
“I appeal to you, brothers and sisters, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, that all of you agree with one another in what you say and that there be no divisions among you, but that you be perfectly united in mind and thought.” I Corinthians 1:10
I don’t know about you, but when my kids are the ones being picked on, Mama feels all the feelings. I’m talking anger, hurt, and, in this particular case, bafflement, at who was doing the bullying and who didn’t step in to stop it.
My youngest daughter had a bit of a lisp, and some of the boys on the school bus were making of her. They would tease her, call her names, and mimic her talking with her lisp, of course exaggerating. Spit actually flew from their middle school mouths to my little girl’s face!
She came home in a puddle of humiliation.
I wanted to climb aboard the yellow bus like a mildly deranged mama bear and have a swipe or two at those hooligans, but of course, I restrained myself. (I aspire to be sanely involved with my children’s conflicts.) I prayed for grace, forgiveness, and wisdom, because the main instigator was the son of a friend. Yikes!
And my son was a witness to what had been happening to his sister.
“Sweetie, what did you do when those mean boys were picking on her?”
My usually reliable son averted his eyes and lowered his head.
Sweet Molasses! I wanted to jump out of my skin. But motherhood is all about gulping those deep breaths and praying those ‘Help me, now!’ prayers. “Nothing? You watched your sister get spit on and you did nothing? Help me understand.”
Before he could respond, I kept going (as moms do):
“Honey, we belong to the same family—we are Bultemas. We stick together. Family doesn’t stand by and do nothing when our sister or our brother needs help. Family members take care of each other.”
I was trying to teach my son about family, about unity and how to pursue it in our broken, hurting world.
The bus drama with my daughter sparked negative emotions in me, but it was also an opportunity to remember I am called to pursue unity, with bullies and moms of bullies, and with my siblings in Christ.
“Unity” is kind of a churchy word, but like Paul said in 1 Corinthians 1:10, it just means agreeing with one another, with no divisions, no conflict. (“Division” in ancient Greek has a connotation of ripping or tearing fabric, so literally Paul begged the church members in Corinth to not be ripped apart.)
But…drama and conflict come up all the time—can I get a witness?
It pops up with friends, kids, siblings, and between husbands and wives. It flares on the playground, the workplace, the big yellow school bus.
We can’t avoid conflict, but we do get to choose how to deal with it. Do we make the rip worse or do we do all we can to mend, to heal?
When he wrote his letter, Paul knew the local church in this Greek city was a hot mess of overblown drama and bitter contention. Four cliques had formed—Team Paul, Team Apollos, Team Cephas (or Peter), and Team Jesus, a group which boasted that they were above all the petty squabbling. Each was sure they were right and everyone else was wrong. (Sound familiar in our current culture?) Church members were even suing each other!
I love how Paul writes his letter with a pastor’s heart, using family language. No less than twenty times Paul addresses his “brothers and sisters,” his “adelphos” in Greek. His loving yet firm tone is one we might use if we were going out for coffee with a sibling or a friend who had lost their way. “Oh, friend…I love you, but this has got to stop.”
Let…“there be no divisions among you,” Paul writes.
No he said/she said
No spitting on each other.
No hurting each other!
“…be perfectly united in mind and thought.”
Build each other up.
Gently, patiently, kindly.
Get up ev’rybody and sing!
Okay, so that last line is not technically in the verse, but this whole discussion of getting along in the family of God gives me a flashback to fourth grade. The roller rink, my Shaun Cassidy satin jacket and bell bottom jeans. And “We Are Family” by Sister Sledge:
“We are family
I got all sisters with me
We are family
Get up ev-rybody and sing!”
Great song, and even greater message.
By the way, the instigator in my girl’s bus drama? With his mom’s encouragement, he came over and apologized, giving my daughter a bookstore gift card he bought with his own money. Grace ruled, and harmony was restored.
Life delivers many reasons to be at odds with our sisters (and our brothers). Let’s look for ways to be at one with them, instead. Let’s also look for ways to be family to each other, to stand up for each other as dearly loved daughters and sons of a Good Father. Because family takes care of each other, always.
Lord, forgive us for believing the lies of the enemy that tear us apart as your own children. Help us be peacemakers, drama diffusers, and restorers in every way. Thank You that you designed us for unity. In Jesus’ Name, Amen
Cindy’s latest Bible study, Live Full Walk Free: Set Apart in a Sin-Soaked World was released in December 2016 at Thomas Nelson. For a sneak peek of the DVD teaching that enhances chapter 2’s study watch here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q4AfjzaDYxQ&t=156s. Visit Cindy on her blog to download a FREE sample chapter of Live Full Walk Free, along with a set of A-Z scripture cards: http://www.cindybultema.com/live-full-walk-free/.
With nearly 20 years of ministry experience, Cindy is a popular women’s speaker, author, and Bible teacher. But don’t let her cheerful smile fool you—Cindy has endured single parenting, overcome bondage to addiction, and survived tragic loss. Cindy lives in Michigan with her husband and their four kids. Most days you can find Cindy walking her beagle Rocky, attending one of her boys’ hockey games, or serving hot lunch at her kids’ school.