By Krissy L. Nelson 

These kids are driving me crazy!

Yeah, that’s right I said it.  I said the thing that most mothers think and feel at some point but shy away from saying out loud, or God forbid – put in writing!

Crazy…

Batty…

Looney tunes…

It’s really nothing new for me to feel this way.  It happens on about a weekly basis (daily lately).  It’s just the first time I’ve been brave enough to write about it and allow the world to know this private, internal struggle…

In the past I’ve struggled to sit down to write about my children driving me crazy.  I struggle because on the one hand I know that other mothers of toddlers must be dealing with the same, or similar, frustrations and would therefore benefit from hearing they are not alone; but on the other hand I am a strong believer in looking for the positive, a glass is “half full” kinda gal.  So I struggle with what angle women would benefit from the most – hearing my “My kids are driving me crazy, but I still love them, but they’re driving me crazy” or “It can be tough sometimes but it will get better-kids are just curious-God will give you strength.”

On a day like today and in a moment like I am in RIGHT NOW I find myself wondering – Do other mothers struggle as much as I do sometimes?  Do other mothers find that their children drive them batty?  If I say, “My kids are driving me crazy,” does that make me a bad mother?

So on a day like today I find that I benefit from, “My kids are driving me crazy, but I still love them, but they’re driving me crazy” AND “It can be tough sometimes but it will get better-kids are just curious-God will give you strength.”  Both are true and both are important to acknowledge.  I have come to realize that by shying away from being (brutally) honest about the struggles of motherhood the frustrations can fester on the inside until they bubble at the surface and eventually come exploding out of me in a fit of anger toward my children.

Yeah… there’s the brutal honesty part…

Therefore, I need to remind all of the mothers out there, especially those with toddlers, that YOU ARE NOT ALONE!  My kids drive me crazy… and yours likely will too at some point.  It is normal.  Other mothers do struggle as much as you do.  You are not a bad mother for thinking your children drive you crazy.  Try to be honest about the struggles and you will be a better mama for it.

Today I have screamed, yelled, cried, blown a blood vessel (or two) and no doubt scarred my children for life.  Boy, I sure hope that is not the case… but I fear that it is.  Every time I get frustrated with them I fear they are going to remember it forever.  But then I hear a still small voice whisper in my ear, “My grace is sufficient.”  And as I allow those words to penetrate my soul I take a deep breath and remember that while I may fail miserably at times as a mama His grace is, in fact, sufficient.  His grace covers my frustrations and protects my children from permanent damage.  His grace allows me to mess up and not worry that I am starting some vicious cycle in myself… I can make mistakes as long as I learn from them.   The learning part is key.  His grace will cover me but I have to do my part as well and continue seeking Him for wisdom, strength, and perseverance to ensure that moving forward I continue to grow stronger and stronger thus limiting the amount of “blow ups” I have.

So… what I plan to do now is scoop my children into my arms and tell them that I love them and that I am sorry for being a “grumpy mommy” (that’s what we call it when I have these days).  I will ask their forgiveness and receive their compassion because just as important it is for them to say sorry when they make mistakes so it is for mama too.

Remember, His grace is sufficient.  His compassion is limitless.  Your kids are going to be just fine… and so are you.  You are not alone.

Dear Jesus, allow your grace to wash over each and every mama reading this.  Replace weakness with strength.  Fill every crack and crevice with Your love.  Remind us that we CAN do it!  We are good mommies! And our kids are going to be just fine.  Thank you, Father, that we are never alone in this journey.  You are right there beside us ready to help when ever we need you.  In Jesus Mighty Name, Amen

It’s my privilege to be sharing with Krissy in the 1st Not aLone Mom pre-conference in Pensacola, Florida on October 25, 2013. We’ll be bringing authentic hope to moms of all ages! Stay tuned for more details!